When I told my daughter that I feel freer having this novel out in the world, no longer struggling to decide what it wants to be because it just is, she asked what I feel freer to do now.
What a marvelous question! I told her I want to think on that.
Obviously, novel number three is already in motion, so that’s one thing. An acquaintance asked me today at the café what I’m working on, and I told him that I’m learning how to write a riddle for my literary mystery. That’s a skill I hadn’t counted on having to acquire.
Oh, and then there’s time and energy for fitness once again. As I told Mia (the daughter), I’ve moved to the “big girl bike” at the gym. Gradually, I’m getting better on it, and I’m feeling great, which is the best part.
I feel absolutely no pressure to finish this next novel right away. I want to enjoy the journey in a way I struggled to do with the last book.
With Southern-Fried Woolf, I wanted someone to guide me every step of the way, to read drafts and tell me what worked and what didn’t. I wanted to bounce ideas off someone regularly so that I wouldn’t spiral off in the wrong direction. I wanted a trusted eye, an editor of sorts, to help me do something I wasn’t sure I could.
While there were many generous people who helped me along the way, there was no regular, dependable presence. No one to read my chapters and push me in a direction. Which turned out okay in the end. What I learned is, I can figure it out for myself. Even when it’s difficult. Even when it feels impossible. Even when someone else might have a better idea. It doesn’t matter if their idea is better if I never hear it. All I have is me, and that’s okay. Brings to mind the lyrics of McCartney’s “Figure Of Eight.” If you know, you know.
Now if only I could learn to edit what I say so I don’t inadvertently put my foot in my mouth as I am wont to do, not realizing until later what it might have sounded like…my anxiety makes it difficult for me to speak sometimes, and when I do…sometimes….
Remind me sometime to tell you the latest thing my anxiety “made” me say. It’s funny, in retrospect.
I may take the weekend off from blog posts so I can focus on writing. And then there’s that wine and chocolate tasting to attend. And I’ve got a riddle to write, remember? 😉 But the tour continues!
P.S. Today would have been my dad’s birthday, and I’m feeling it. I miss him.
For Ashley: here’s what I was talking about.
8 thoughts on “Figure of Eight”
Love hearing your new novel is in the world and you’re allowing yourself to enjoy the experience of creation ❤️
While I 100% agree with this:
“What I learned is, I can figure it out for myself. Even when it’s difficult. Even when it feels impossible. Even when someone else might have a better idea. It doesn’t matter if their idea is better if I never hear it. All I have is me, and that’s okay…”
I want you to know I also wholeheartedly volunteer to be your regular presence for your future drafts. That is one of my absolutely favorite parts of the process in which to see someone else’s work. So what’s your new one about 😉
Also, I’m sorry to hear about you missing your dad. I feel that to my core.
Thank you on all counts!! You’re my writing friend of all friends!! (I hope you got a peek at my acknowledgements page. ;-))
I’m writing a literary mystery that I’m still figuring out, LOL. More soon!
Um yeah, literary mystery, when you are ready to share and/or need an additional eye, I am so there. I haven’t seen the acknowledgements page yet! In Southern-Fried Woolf?
Yes, in SFW. I’m trying to add a screenshot of it here but I’m having trouble figuring out how to lol! And yay, thank you for the offer! I will totally take you up on that!! 👍🏻💜
And thank you for mentioning my dad. 💜🥲💜 I hope you haven’t suffered that loss yourself.
*in the works* lol
P.S. Added a screenshot, LOL. Hope you like it.
I just saw the acknowledgement! How did I miss it, already halfway done with the book 🤣 I swear I read them too!