Dear Reader,
I knew Word Raccoon was going to try to sleep in, even though she was well aware that we had a hair appointment this morning. Even though, furthermore, she knew I wanted to finish reading my book. (I did this afternoon…whoa! No spoilers, but…whoa!)
Most people have a mental list of what they need to prepare for the hair salon. Word Raccoon, however, has specific requirements and doesn’t always remember things your average person might.
Here’s the checklist I made her run through:
- Eat breakfast. Our hair appointments last 2 ½ hours. Nourishment is required. Leftover Mexican food? Fine. Just eat.
- Do NOT wear a “good” blouse. Also do not wear scrubbies, because we have standards.
- Remember that the salon is ALWAYS cold. No matter the season. No dresses, no skirts, no shorts. Wear long sleeves. Consider a sweater, but see above.
Y’all, the thermostat read 62 degrees in there this morning! It was up to a balmy 64 before we left…the hot towel around our hair was our favorite part of the visit. No, seeing our stylist after so long actually was. And that other stylist, too.
- Do not wear jewelry. Earrings? Asking for it. Necklace? Might be okay, but play it safe. Bracelet? Probably passable. Anklet? The early 2000’s are calling; why do you still have anklets, Sis?
- Shoes – comfy, not sandals that will fall off your feet when she hikes you up in the chair like a toddler. No heels. But cute, because the rest of you will be draped in a cape, and something had better be featured.
- Arrival time: no sooner than 5 minutes before your appointment. Since they are by appointment only, chances are, no one will be there yet, which is fine. Just be sure WR stays content until then.
- Pack snacks. More than you would think. Because all of that chatting and consulting and book/TV talk will take it out of you, and WR requires snacks to regulate. Today I brought raisins, pretzels, and one of her ubiquitous protein bars just in case. Sound like a toddler’s food? Agreed!
- Speaking of books and movies, if you bring a book, be prepared to give a synopsis of it to anyone who sees it in your hands. If you are going to mention a TV series, either get the title right, WR, or at least the platform it’s on! (WR seldom remembers either.)
- A charger. Sure, there’s a phone charging station, but what if it’s spoken for? You KNOW your phone battery will mysteriously drain while there. Maybe it’s all of the scrolling you do while you’re processing. (Which WR calls “marinating,” much to her stylist’s delight.)
- Wash your car beforehand! Yes, even if it does mean you won’t get a chance to run in and get a Coke Zero before your appointment. You know your stylist has water and coffee, and probably has at least Diet Coke hiding in the back. (The old place had wine…shhh…) You want that chariot to shine.
- Know what you want! My stylist has saved me from many a bad hair decision, though she has allowed me many different fun colors. (I suspect it’s because she knows they wash out of my hair within a week, even if they are “permanent.”)
She hears me out and tells me just why I shouldn’t (I swear this was before the trend) color one side of my hair black. She did allow me to get chunky “Lost” style highlights, though they weren’t as irregular as I wanted; she’s more conservative than I am, hair wise. I told her she can’t let me become boring. What she really does is keep WR from taking over.
(Don’t tell my stylist, but I think she took more hair off the bottom than I asked today…I said two inches even though she was showing me like four and I think she split the difference…but I got my layers back that I wanted to enhance my curls, so there’s that.)
- Send phone calls to voicemail if you receive any while you’re in the chair. Wait, who gets phone calls nowadays? (I actually did today while in the chair, and I dared WR to answer it as I sent it to voicemail. The voicemail was followed up immediately with an email, which is our preference anyway.)
- Be prepared to discuss your health and medication if it’s affecting your hair. Don’t be shy – she’s a professional.
- It goes without saying that you should be polite and friendly to others in the salon, but also mind your beeswax, right? Topical discussions = insert yourself freely. Whispered conversations? Pretend you are reading.
- Tip generously. Always. We like this person, she’s worked hard for us, and she once styled our hair for free for a TV interview!
- I would say make your next appointment before you leave, but there’s a new system here where I use a QR code to make my own. Had to put a reminder on my calendar, but it’s kinda nice to not have to juggle things at the counter. As it was, I left my book and glasses at the hair station as I was leaving. Oops.
- Have dinner planned ahead, the day of your appointment. Better yet, plan on going out. Because your hair is going to look the best it will this go-round. (Our neighbor happened to bring over potato soup for us yesterday, so no cooking for us today. And long live neighbors who bring you food gifts for no reason!)
Overall, I must say that WR was quiet and read with absorption over my shoulder most of the appointment, though she did want to wander around and talk and guarded the length of our hair a bit too ferociously.
She did really, really want to ask them to shut the window, too, but I figured fresh air might be good for her. Her throat begs to differ.
Now if only these curls last until Saturday’s fundraiser.
dremadrudge.com 